Friday, March 15, 2013

Excerpt from my Work in Progress

I'm currently working on a sci-fi thriller, so the excerpt below might seem a bit out of place. All I can say is that it will make perfect sense once you can read the actual book!


The wizard Xax peeked out from behind the boulder at the cave entrance.  The dark hole was at the back of a small rock-strewn ravine in a wall of crumbling limestone.  He glanced over at his three hirelings.

“You’re sure that’s it?” he whispered.

The slender red-haired woman with all the knives nodded and leaned close to him.  “It's as they said it would be.  It must be it.”

Xax stared back at the cave mouth.  “ Doesn't look so bad.”

There was an odd stench here, something Xax couldn't place.  Little grew other than some patches of brown grass.

No one in the nearby hamlets could say exactly what sort of creature made this its lair.  Some said a dragon, which was absurd given how small the entrance was.  Others said it was a huge snake, or perhaps some large spiders.  The only thing they all agreed on was that no one who had entered the hole had ever returned.

Xax hadn't come here for whatever beast might inhabit the lair.  A priest of Pelius had told him that a member of their sect had carried a knucklebone of St. Cletus into the lair.  They wanted it back, and they were willing to pay a lot of gold if he would retrieve it.  And I need that gold if I’m ever to find my sister again, he thought.

He caught the eye of the huge bald-headed fellow with the crisscrossing scars on his face and the rusty mace.  “What do you say, Surly?  Lead the way?”

Surly scowled and grunted, which was about as articulate as the man got.  He slid around the edge of the boulder and stalked toward the lair entrance.

The red-haired woman, Telia, readied a pair of throwing knives and followed.

The last of Xax's companions, a nearly blind old man with a rusty voulge, grinned and said, “Go on, sorcerer.  I've got your back.”

What good a blind man would do, Xax had no idea, but the sparsely populated nearby villages had offered few henchmen for hire.  “With a blade like that and bad eyes, Lovash, I’d much rather have you in front of me.”

Lovash's grin widened.  “Don’t hurt to try.”  He hopped up and crept after Telia.

Xax tightened his grip on his staff and peered over the top of the boulder.  Telia was lighting a torch, while Surly stood across from her at the entrance, ready to hand her a second torch once she got the first lit.  Lovash poked the blade of his voulge into the blackness of the cave entrance, then grinned back at Xax and waved him forward.

Xax breathed deeply three times before scurrying out from behind the boulder.  He imagined the dead eyes of a vast scaly snake bursting forth from the darkness to plunge long fangs into his side.  He panicked, stumbled, and fell directly into the hole.

Gravel bit into his arms as Xax desperately tried to stop his slide.  He couldn't see in the darkness.  He twisted to his side and crashed into hard stone.  With a groan, he blindly tried to assess the damage.  His hands and arms burned from deep scrapes, and his hip bone was bruised.  He had no idea where his staff was.

Then there was light, and scuffing sounds as the three hirelings entered the cave.  Xax groaned again and looked up at Surly as the bald man drew near, a flickering torch held high.

“You all right, old man?” said Telia as she crept in next to Surly.  “ Didn't realize you were that eager to get inside.”

“You see it?” Xax said, unable to keep the fear from his voice.  “Anything moving?”

“Only Lovash,” Telia replied.  “I don’t see...oh, hellfire!”

Surly moaned.

“What?” said Xax.  “What is it?”

“Pick him up, Surly,” Telia said, her voice shaking.  “ We've gotta get outta here now.”

“I can’t see nothing,” Lovash said.  “What do you see?”

Surly stuck the torch in Lovash's hand and reached down to yank Xax up by the clasp of his cloak.

Xax was too frightened to care about the rough handling.  The pillar of stone that had halted his fall was not a stalagmite as he had thought.  It was a statue of an armored man, perfect in every detail.  He looked past the man and saw that they were in a large cavern.  Dozens of such statues filled the room, some holding their hands up in fright, others gripping stone weapons.  Xax turned his wide eyes to Telia and saw his own horror reflected in the flickering light in her eyes.

“Surly,” she screamed.

Xax whirled to see the huge bald warrior frozen in place, his eyes blank and his mouth gaping.  Like a pebble dropped into a pool of water, a ripple spread from Surly’s eyes, flesh turning to stone with the slightest of crackling sounds.

Telia yelled, “Run!” and scrambled up the gravelly slope toward the light of the entrance.

“What is it?” cried Lovash, dropping the torch and swinging his voulge in a sweep until it clanged against one of the stone statues.

Xax had trouble catching his breath.  “Basilisk,” he whispered.  He tried crawling after Telia, but was yanked back by Surly’s stone hand, still gripping his cloak.

Lovash dropped the voulge and rushed after Telia.

“Ah, gods!”  Xax finally found his voice.  “Come back, Lovash.  I’m stuck!”

The old man ignored him and vanished into the sunlight pouring through the entrance.

Xax heard Telia's voice shout something and the sound of running before all was silent save for the crackling of the two abandoned torches lying on the floor.  He saw his staff lying near his feet and reached for it, but Surly’s arm held him up.

Xax froze as a slight scraping sound reached his ears.  Scales slithering over stone?

He redoubled his efforts to reach his staff, but his fingers came up inches short.  Blood pattered onto the stone floor from the scrapes on his hands.  He grasped for the clasp, but it was buried in Surly’s stone fist.  In desperation he thrust himself up and let himself fall, hoping his cloak would tear.

A hissing sound came from somewhere just behind, much too close.  Xax wedged a foot up against Surly and pushed with all his strength, but the cloak didn't give.

Sorry to leave you with a cliffhanger, but the direction the story takes from this point in my WIP doesn't fit with this particular post, so I decided to cut it off there. Hopefully some of you might read the actual book someday, once I get it finished.

Sunday, March 3, 2013

Reading A Dance With Dragons

I'm about halfway through reading A Dance With Dragons, the latest book in George R.R. Martin's A Song of Ice and Fire series. I've said it before, but Martin is the greatest living fantasy author, at least for my taste. Don't get me wrong, I love many others, from Ursula Le Guin to Patrick Rothfuss and more, but Martin fits my taste almost perfectly.

I'm lucky, too, that I was able to find a mass-market paperback version of the book in English, since that isn't scheduled to come out until October. (Since I move a lot, I refuse to buy bulky, heavy hardcovers) Lots of people have complained about both this book and A Feast for Crows, but I have to say, I love them nearly as much as the earlier books. The writing grips me just as strongly and sweeps me away into a world that fits my sense of adventure perfectly.

I do have some minor quibbles, though not about how slowly Martin produces his books--as far as I'm concerned, he should take the time he needs in order to get them right. My main quibble is that Daenerys Targaryen is simply too passive, naive, and almost stupid in her chapters. I know she is very young still, but she has been through so much that she should have grown up a bit and gained some wisdom...or at least be able to listen to some of the wisdom of people like Ser Barristan Selmy. Instead she sits around moaning and doing almost nothing except stupid things like agreeing to marry someone very wrong for her. I haven't yet read far enough to see how badly that turns out, but I don't have to in order to know that it will turn badly very quickly, and she should have known it would. Her naivete regarding the slave trade and slave cities is just astounding--you can't make such sweeping changes without shaking up the world and turning almost everyone against you.

The last thing I wanted to mention was that I saw a riddle that Martin threw in to one of Dany's chapters, and it made me guess that the two dragon riders other than Dany will most likely be Tyrion and the 'Frog' prince of Dorne who has just arrived in her city at the point where I am reading. Of course, it could be another Dornish person or another Lannister, but that seems doubtful. Anyone else think this when reading the book?